TREN kencan terbaru yang sedang ramai dibicarakan di TikTok adalah rock-and-star relationship theory. Teori ini membahas dinamika dua tipe kepribadian yang bertolak belakang dalam sebuah hubungan—si “rock” yang stabil dan si “star” yang spontan—serta bagaimana perbedaan karakter tersebut dapat saling melengkapi atau justru memicu konflik jika tidak seimbang.
Apa Itu Teori Hubungan Rock-and-Star?
Teori hubungan rock-and-star menyatakan bahwa terdapat dua jenis pasangan dalam sebuah hubungan: si rock (sosok yang stabil) dan si star (sosok yang spontan). Kombinasi keduanya dipercaya mampu menciptakan pasangan yang ideal.
“The rock-and-star relationship theory is the idea that an ideal relationship is when the two individuals are opposite in terms of energy/personalities,” kata Susan Trombetti, pakar jodoh dan CEO dari Exclusive Matchmaking.
“The ‘rock’ is the more steady, type A individual. This is the person who may be a little quieter or reserved, planning ahead, etc.,” lanjutnya. “The ‘star’ is the person who is possibly louder and more spontaneous. Think of it as more so as the person that has more of a Type B personality.”
Kelebihan Dinamika Rock-and-Star
Jika kedua pihak bersedia saling menyesuaikan dan belajar satu sama lain, dinamika hubungan ini bisa menjadi sangat seimbang dan harmonis.
“These types of personalities complement each other because they push one another out of their shells/comfort zones,” ujar Trombetti. “The rock is preparing for the future, but the star is reminding their partner to have some fun!”
“As a matchmaker, I see this dynamic all the time. It works well because opposites really do attract,” jelas April Davis, pendiri sekaligus celebrity matchmaker di LUMA Luxury Matchmaking dan pelatih kencan tersertifikasi. “With the rock and star, there’s less competition. Each partner is comfortable [with] what they bring to the table and their role in each other’s lives.”
Di sisi lain, hubungan yang terdiri dari dua orang rock atau dua orang star bisa lebih sulit dijalani—bisa jadi penuh dengan kepraktisan tanpa hiburan, atau justru perebutan perhatian. Setiap rock membutuhkan starmereka, dan setiap star membutuhkan rock mereka.
“There’s also something really nice about being able to come home and not feel like you’re still on stage,” tambah Davis. “If you spend your whole day being the star at work, having someone who grounds you and knows you outside of that can be very comforting.”
Kekurangan Dinamika Hubungan Rock-and-Star
Saat tidak seimbang, dinamika ini memiliki sisi negatif. Sebagai contoh, jika si star bertindak ceroboh hingga mengalami masalah keuangan dan berharap si rock membereskan kekacauan tersebut; atau sebaliknya, si rock terlalu kaku hingga tanpa sadar meredupkan pesona si star.
“The negative could be if one of the two people [is] extreme,” tutur Trombetti. “Both people need to be able to compromise when they have very different ways of living.”
Selain itu, meskipun si star secara alami lebih menonjol, si rock tetap membutuhkan perhatian dan apresiasi. Kedua pasangan harus merasa sama-sama dihargai, didukung, dan penting dalam hubungan.
“The potential downside to this dynamic is if the rock sets aside their personal goals and ambition so their partner can shine,” ungkap Davis. “The rock still needs to feel appreciated and loved. If only one person gets all the attention and has their dreams supported, resentment is going to build very quickly.”
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